EPIC FAIL

Www.urbandictionary.com has several definitions of epic fail.  The first being "complete and total failure when success should have been reasonably easy to attain".  That pretty much describes what eating was like for me...seems like a reasonably attainable thing to do but was met with failure.  Some people may work 9 to 5, but my body was definitely not working 5 to 9.  Those weeks were what I refer to as an epic fail!

Eating.  Doesn't sound difficult.  Most people joke that all a pregnant woman does is eat.  "Oh, she's eating for two."  Like it's some precious thing.  And let's be honest...it is a pretty nice excuse when you do feel like eating to have a little extra.  After all, pregnancy is the only time a belly is cute.

But usually before the excessive eating is this period of epic failure.  I can't tell you how wasteful I have felt.  Several times my sweet husband would get food I would tell him I thought I could eat, only for me to stare at it trying not to dry heave.  There is nothing better than trying to chew food and not vomit at the same time.  Most of the time I would throw it out or ask my husband to eat it.  We have joked that he is going to gain more weight than me because he keeps having to eat my food so I don't feel wasteful.  He is a good man.

My favorite is the trips to the store.  When you have no cravings its a little difficult to buy food.  At one point I was just putting random items in the cart.  I figured something would have to work at home.  I let my husband by stuff I never buy.  Spaghettios?  Sure.  Why not?  Beef jerky?  Sure...as long as he doesn't eat it anywhere near me because that is an epic smell fail.  Chocolate chip mini muffins?  Well, anything mini is cute.

This epic fail is not limited to food.  It also applies to drinks.  When water was an issue, because water is not exactly comforting to a queezy stomach, I bought three different kinds of gatorade.  None of which seemed to taste normal (probably because everything tasted like metal).  So, I bought orange juice and pomegranate juice to mix.  Then there was Caprisuns.  What am I five?  I felt like I was regressing.  I am a girl who believes in organic fruits and veggies, whole grains, healthy food.  And I am drinking juice boxes.

BUT...what I have discovered in all of that is that sometimes failure is okay.  It's not a word we like.  But better to have tried and failed, than to not have tried at all, especially when it comes to eating for two.  Or at least that is what I am telling myself to feel a little less wasteful and to embrace the fact that weeks 5 to 9 were an EPIC FAIL!  Week 10 has been much kinder and so I am putting the failure behind me and pressing on (said as I chow down on a chocolate chunk brownie).